The occasional ramblings of the author of Quantum Shaman: Diary of a Nagual Woman, and the site author of QuantumShaman.com. Is life worth living? Is death worth dying for? Is the world a nuthouse and the lunatics are running the asylum? If you answered yes or no to any of these questions, you are seriously disturbed and this blog will most likely make you smile or laugh or cry or throw expensive objects at the wall. Come on in!
For the sake of clarity, it would help to comprehend what is really meant by a shifting of the assemblage point. What you think of as reality is organized and categorized according to the ordinary input of the five senses, yes? But more than that, it goes something like this: a tree is a tree and it is green and leafy because this is the language the dominant species has chosen to identify that construct to the masses. It is an object made of language to which everyone has agreed to agree as to what the words generally mean. Ah, but to someone who has learned to see, the tree is really only an arrangement of energy cast in the shape of the tree. In first attention, the tree is the tree because the word has meaning. In second attention, the tree is an arrangement of energy, clearly seen, resembling what is known to the first attention as "tree". In the third attention, or the seventh sense, the energy comprising the tree is actually the raw matter of true quantum sorcery, and can be called upon to represent whatever the sorcerer might desire to perceive. This is the foundation of creation, the cornerstone of a separate reality.
Ah, but never forget: the act of creation requires extreme energy, so the goal of entering the seventh sense isn't just to begin rearranging all the stray molecules into castles and dragons and faerie creatures of lore. Just as the world with which you are familiar is largely created for you by those who have gone before, so it is here, but the difference is that here the world is will and death is neither landlord nor tenant.
So what does this have to do with a shift of the assemblage point? Simply this: as long as you see only the tree, a tree is all it will ever be. When you learn to perceive the glossy construct of the underlying energy, you have taken a step toward undoing the world of matter and men. And when at last you stand in the seventh sense and can command the energy of the tree to be anything you will it to be, you will have mastered your own creation in ways that should begin to be obvious to you. Shall I give you a hint? It is this: in the seventh sense, the trick to staying is to recreate the self using the tools of perception and the will and intent of the sorcerer's magick. Understand this, for it is the secret to your ultimate evolution: when you can enter the seventh sense and will the raw matter/energy of creation to be the immortal "other," and when you can not only interact with it but exert will and intent to inhabit it, you will have willed your own immortality, yes?
Study this. Lightly and deeply, with delicate vision. Read it in half-light where logic looks over the shoulder of magick, only a background voice in the chorus. Think on it in the alpha shadows of early dreams. Understand it with the body-spirit even if the stubborn program of your humanity tries to brush the words aside. Know that words are reality. When your humanity fights to cling to the words of the world it knows, it is because these otherwords can create otherworlds which threaten the status quo. I am the destroyer of stasis. You are the creators of reality. We are creator and created, dreaming toward one another. When we meet in the middle the dream becomes a separate reality capable of being inhabited. This is how we seize the tiller of creation. This is how we become I Am.
Orlando (November, 2000) Excerpted from Quantum Shaman (Diary of a Nagual Woman)
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I have come to see that one reason so many of us are drawn to the Toltec path is because we do
know - from the intuitive level of silent knowing - that there is a way to retain our awareness and inhabit the totality of ourselves
after our physical bodies run out of juice. I am acutely aware of things I
believe, and yet I would have to honestly say that my understanding/experience
of the double goes well beyond just a belief system. I cannot say that I know
the entire process of what happens to us after we die, but the
gnosis which comes directly from the double creates a synapse of
energy/awareness that is not unlike having one "self" here in this
world, and the other "self" already in the infinite - which is probably
why THE EAGLE'S GIFT resonated with me on such a profound level. For myself,
it's not just something I believe, it's who I am.
Granted, that is purely subjective. 100%. Maybe it will seem like only a belief to some, but I can say with certainty that what I have experienced
of the double comes from an aspect of myself that is nowhere near the same as
my belief, for example, that the sun will rise tomorrow. The awareness is
experienced in a different way, and in an entirely different "part"
of the energy body.
People who
make a living reading body language say that when a person is telling the
truth, they may tend to look up and to the right - they are accessing the
actual memory banks of the physical brain, calling down the hard drive, so to
speak. OTOH, when the person is creating a fiction, they will look up and to
the left, accessing the creative brain/mind. My experience of both "the right way to live" (a concept brought forth by don Juan) and
gnosis (silent knowing) come from whatever aspect of the self has Knowledge - the hard drive of experience.
My belief that the sun will rise tomorrow, or that the car will start up so I
can drive to work... come from the creative/belief aspect.
Again, wholly acknowledged as 100% subjective... but that's okay by me because
I know and trust who I am. So... I know what I believe, I believe what I
choose, and I know what I simply and silently know.
SOME FURTHER THOUGHTS
In my experience, the double can remain entirely within the
existing humanform, or it can essentially bi-locate anywhere/anywhen in the
manifestation of the multi-verse. As an aside, this is how I see so-called
"past lives" - not other bodies or other times we have inhabited, but
other positions of our own assemblage point, experienced & recorded by the
double. At times (such as Dreaming or intense journeys with power plants) one
may actually shift the "human" (mortal) awareness into the assemblage point of the double - and there is a sudden influx of awareness/experience/knowledge
to which we do not have access in ordinary awareness.
What I've determined is that the whole
purpose of this "double" - which is comprised of energy and
awareness, but which MAY become manifest if there is sufficient reason (as
Genaro's double often did), is that it creates an energetic "mirror"
of sorts which MAY serve as a point of reference and/or a point of perception
for our awareness following the death of the physical form. The double is the self in eternity/infinity.
What it
boils down to is that the mortal self is like the egg in which awareness
gestates (and grows, through experience & nurturing), and the double is the
infinite and eternal configuration which is not limited by humanform concerns
into which our awareness "hatches". The double is the super-position
of the assemblage point** - once the double is sufficiently dreamed
by the warrior, it is everywhere and nowhere, and all that would be required
for it to manifest would be intent and focus.
Because the double is ubiquitous, it has access to the all - knowledge,
awareness, information - and it may serve as guide/mentor to the human self in
the manner that don Juan referred to as "the double is now dreaming
you." The sufficiently developed double becomes the teacher/benefactor,
though this may even occur at a level where the mortal/earthly warrior isn't
really aware of it until some time later, if ever. I've long felt that Don Juan Matus was
Carlos's double, but by the time Carlos figured it out, there was simply no way he
could have explained it to the world at large through his books. He
gave some hints, I felt, but that's another story for another time.
__________
**SUPER-POSITION OF THE SELF or SUPER-POSITION OF THE ASSEMBLAGE POINT – A point of awareness wherein the seeker and the Other (double) have conjoined to embrace the Totality of awareness. At this point, consciousness becomes ubiquitous, inhabiting all quantum positions simultaneously, thereby allowing for consciousness to take on certain similarities of light. Particle and wave – particle being what might be experienced should consciousness make the decision to “localize” into a specific point in time and space; wave being the non-local presentation of awareness, wherein it is a ubiquitous field spanning all of space/time simultaneously.
__________
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by Mikal Nyght
Author of TEACHINGS OF THE IMMORTALS
If you are caught in the leg trap of politics or the cess pool of religion, then you have not yet overcome the part of you that thinks "It Matters!"
When a seeker tells me, "I like to be informed," what I am really hearing is the prittle prattle of self-importance and the puffing out of the chest which generally indicates that the seeker has become so full of shite that he cannot see the forest for the big brown logs he is producing to obscure his own path.
"Oh my precious lord!" some are certain to exclaim. "Is Mikal saying we shouldn't vote? shouldn't care? shouldn't even know what's going on in the world?" No. What I'm saying is that a true seeker doesn't need to get "involved" in the political monkey circus unless he has made the commitment to the consensus, and if that is the case, then he might as well abandon this path altogether, suckle up to the teat of Society, and become a card-carrying member of The Real World, and therefore also a member in good standing of The Lunatic Majority, which would try to convince you of its righteous goodness by virtue of its numbers and all those celebrities with their perfectly capped white teeth who smile the alluring smile of a phantom and tell you why you should vote for This or That Trending Asshole, when the reality is that you already know right from wrong in your tiny little heart if you have even the slightest glint of awareness somewhere in that confuddled orb sitting on the top of your shoulders.
Within every living creature (and most inorganics) there is a frequency which aligns with what is commonly called silent knowing. Put simply, you already know through your own intuitive awareness who or what to vote for (if you must insist on playing such pedantic games), you already know who and where The One True God resides, and you already know perfectly well that not one bit of this matters in the Great Big Picture Puzzle known as life on the path to freedom, or even back seat activities on the long & winding road trip to immortality.
You can't really be informed, particularly if you think that education is going to come from the media or social justice warriors or the propaganda being shoved up your chute by this or that political party, or this or that guru, or this or that religious icon. If you really stop and examine where your political bent is coming from, you will find (100% of the time) that you have been programmed by someone or something other than Ultimate Truth, for the sad and ugly truth is that there is no truth in the gladiatorial arena which is the milieu of all politicians. Therefore, how can you be informed when everything you hear or see is a Lie? You know this, but you do not want to believe it, because you have been so conditioned to think-you-believe in what is right and good, when you are really only a rusty mouthpiece and conduit for the bullshit that is going up your arse and coming out of your mouth in the form of regurgitated rhetoric and dangerous dogma.
Think. For. Yourself.
If you decide you really must vote, then do so. But do so 1) knowing it will make no difference whatsoever; and 2) from the assemblage point of silent knowing that has nothing to do with what you have heard or read or seen on the righteous flat screen screaming at you from the very pit of the lowest common denominator. Treat it as controlled folly if you must, but it is the kind of folly that tends to have a lot of glue, making it difficult to put aside even when you know it is folly. Best not to try on that mask at all, no?
Believe it or not, if everyone voted from their heart, the world would be a beautiful paradise with trees and flowers and chirping birds and a new car in every garage and free housing and no-cost medical care for all. (And if you believe that, there's a bridge in Brooklyn I'd like to sell you cheap-cheap.) It makes no difference. Not really. I've been around long enough to see that several times over, but please don't take my word for it. Sit with your Silence. Ask your ethereal twin which way you should vote - and when he stops howling with laughter at your naivete, maybe you will finally start to *see* that those rare few who succeed on this path do so by avoiding the trappings, cliches and false belief systems which otherwise enslave them to the consensus reality for the duration of their short lives.
Immortality isn't found in political areanas or religious agendas. If you think otherwise, you have already lost the battle.
In the aftermath of the Orlando shootings at the Pulse nightclub, questions have been raised on all levels - political, cultural, emotional, spiritual. Was it an act of terrorism? Was it a hate crime? Was it the work of a religious fanatic?
When the event first happened, I read all I could, and posted the following to my Facebook page:
Since I'm not known for being politically correct, I'm going to say what I believe rather than what I'm supposta say when some asshat walks into a nightclub and slaughters 50+ people. The bottom line here is that most mass shootings nowadays are carried out by religious nutbags of one ilk or another. I don't care what your particular sect of crazy might be, but you need to understand that you are NOT doing the will of God. For starters, "God" doesn't exist, and even if s/he DID exist, keep in mind that s/he created ALL humans equally (according to myth) - gay, straight, black, white, brown, rainbow sprinkles That being the case, it's not up to YOU to decide who lives and who dies. It's not up to YOU to destroy "God's" creations - for isn't that flying in the face of whatever God you believe in? It's not up to YOU to come into a country that is a "melting pot" and decide that only YOUR beliefs are valid.
Personally, I think ALL religious nutbags (no matter race, color or creed) should be shipped off to an island in the middle of the North Atlantic and forced to live with one another or die trying. (I'm talking about the real nut cases here - not someone with a "social" belief who goes to church for the cupcakes and camaraderie.)
Why is it up to us (anyone!) to watch out for your sad little belief systems, lest you pick up an automatic weapon and start shooting because you are offended? Really? What a pathetic "god" you must worship who created you to be so frightened and absurdly arrogant at the same time. I'm glad the police shot you before you could do anymore damage. I hope you suffered. And I hope you rot in whatever hell you have made for yourself.
Next time you are planning violence, be sure to shoot yourself first - fatally. Only afterward should you take out your petty fanaticism on others.
Most of the comments I received were positive, though a few of them called into question the idea that we all make our choices and must take responsibility for them at one level or another. Hmmm. While I don't disagree with that in the least, I do think it's important to make a distinction between what Carlos Castaneda referred to as "ordinary men" and a warrior or "man of Knowledge."
In his book, A SEPARATE REALITY, Carlos details a conversation with don Juan as follows:
"All I can say to you," don Juan said, "is that a warrior is never available; never is he standing on the road waiting to be clobbered. Thus he cuts to a minimum his chances of the unforeseen. What you call accidents are, most of the time, very easy to avoid, except for fools who are living helter-skelter."
"It is not possible to live strategically all the time," I said. "Imagine that someone is waiting for you with a powerful rifle with a telescopic sight; he could spot you accurately five hundred yards away. What would you do?"
Don Juan looked at me with an air of disbelief and then broke into laughter.
"What would you do?" I urged him.
"If someone is waiting for me with a rifle with a telescopic sight?" he said, obviously mocking me.
"If someone is hiding out of sight, waiting for you. You won't have a chance. You can't stop a bullet."
"No. I can't. But I still don't understand your point."
"My point is that all your strategy cannot be of any help in a situation like that."
"Oh, but it can. If someone is waiting for me with a powerful rifle with a telescopic sight I simply will not come around."
What needs to be understood here is that don Juan as he is portrayed in the books is a man of Knowledge - a Nagual, an enlightened being, a warrior and, yes, a "sorcerer". As such, his awareness is far more keenly honed than that of an ordinary man, so while don Juan may be altogether capable of Knowing the sniper is present, the same cannot be said of humans in general. So when someone tries to argue that those present at the nightclub chose to be present there, and so knowingly chose their death, I would argue that those people were largely if not entirely "ordinary men and women" there to have a good time with friends, dance and drink, and maybe go home with a stranger or long-time companion. Not ours to judge, but also not wise from a spiritual perspective to attempt to draw an alignment between their choices as compared to the choices a man or woman of Knowledge might make. Apples and oranges, people. Humans should be allowed to simply be humans - laughing and dancing and being alive - without having to worry that a crazed fanatic is going to storm the joint and start shooting.
Yes, we all have the potential to be like don Juan - to know when the sniper is present and therefore to choose not to come around - but we also have the potential to realize that don Juan may be a fictional character with super-powers above and beyond those of any ordinary man or woman. I'm not here to debate the veracity of Castaneda. Anyone who follows me knows I have ultimate respect for his works and his teachings, but that doesn't mean I accept them (or any other writings) as Absolute Truth. And it also means, as my own mentor has pointed out countless times, every practitioner has the responsibility to take the Knowledge one step further than where you found it.
Point being - we all have a sixth sense that warns us of possible danger, but most simply don't listen to it (usually because they don't know how), and those who do may often choose to ignore it out of a sense of self-doubt and the social programming that whispers in our ear, "You're just being paranoid. That snake isn't poisonous and that apple looks yummy, so stop being a wuss and just do it!" Unfortunately, whatever decision we make, there are consequences - some of them whimsical, others deadly. But either way, unless someone is already a man or woman of Knowledge - a brujo, sorcerer, seer - those choices occur on a purely subliminal level and seldom at the level of conscious awareness. So to those who would argue that "these people chose their time to die," I would say this is not only highly unlikely, but also a thinly veiled attempt to blame the victims for simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Sorry, but I don't buy into the "Your time has come" logic. These people were vital and alive 24 hours ago and now they are dead because some lunatic religious fanatic decided their time was over. It is not the doings of spirit. It is the doings of (crazy) men. The acts of a madman cannot be minimized in favor of some attempt at comforting oneself with the notion that "it was their choice". That's just an attempt to put one's emotional ducks in a row when what we really need to be doing is looking the snake in the eye and *seeing* it for what it is.
What we need to understand is that most "hate crimes" are actually rooted in religious dogma at some level. By nature, we don't hate gay people or green people or smart people just because of what they are. We learn to hate them by the subtle and not-so-subtle programming that is put onto us by the world at large - religion, politics, culture, etc. In that way, religion is still at the root of most hate crimes. While the Bible may be full of messages of love, it is just as full of messages of hate and fear - so it stands to reason that humans will tend to respond at the lowest common denominator (fear and hatred). Examine your programming. Ask yourself not just what you believe, but why you believe it. Only then will you start to *see* that most of your beliefs come from what you've been told to think rather than what you really know about the world and all those gay, green and other assorted "different" people.
Haters aren't born. They are created from fear and false beliefs. They are often created by well-meaning family members, friends and peers - and more often than not through the accumulation of centuries of religious dogma that hangs like an albatross around the world today.
Understanding that is the first step toward a truer and deeper understanding of why things are the way things are. It is also the first step toward undoing the programs that only limit our unlimited potential.
I can only offer my heart-felt condolences to those who lost loved ones in the Orlando shootings, and my sincere hope that if anything good can come of this, it will be an increased Knowledge that fear, hatred and violence will never solve anything, but only deepen the rift between the self and the infinite. May all who died rest in peace. May the rest of us live with greater awareness and increased empathy for all living things.
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What do you believe and why do you believe it? To learn more about how programming is created and how to rid yourself of it, consider this Quantum Shaman workshop for the solitary practitioner.
by Mikal Nyght
Excerpted with the author's permission, from Teachings of the Immortals
Time and light are irrevocably interconnected. From the human perspective, it is virtually impossible to wrap one's mind around this, because the nature of your programming is such that you have been taught to see time as an effect rather than a cause, as a reflection rather than a substance.
The truth about light is that it is the generator and progenitor of time. Remove light and time will stop. You will become immortal. Eternal. Whole. Einstein knew this in theory. Evolved beings know it through experience. Ah, but you will say that no creature can live in darkness. And that is true to a point. But again, what must change is the manner in which you view light - for how one views something determines one's experience of it, far more than you know.
The sorcerer's trick is twofold, each half of the equation fueled by a different intent. First, a sorcerer may learn to move with the light, to manifest oneself as light manifests - both wave and particle, both substance and reflection - and in doing so, one essentially becomes what is commonly (but perhaps mistakenly) referred to as a being-of-light; not in any connotation of sweetness and light, but in a literal and quantum manifestation of awareness. Since awareness itself travels at well beyond the speed of light - a thought is instanteneous, manifesting from the Nothing into a full-blown concept - it is not difficult to go one step further in altering one's paradigm, to realize that awareness travels in the same manner as light, and so to become a 'being of light' is to move one's assemblage point into a position of pure and whole awareness.
Though it is impossible to put words around such a vast alteration of your existing paradigm, it could be envisioned that the result would be a being who is comprised of the substance of light itself, and could therefore move in and out of corporeality, just as light itself may shift between wave and particle. One might also say that the sorcerer has then become an energy being, and yet in the strictest sense, we are all energy beings, whether we are comprised of light or organic matter.
The other option sorcerers may choose is to move one's awareness between the quanta of light itself. If a being of light might be likened to a yang manifestation, moving between the molecules of light would be a yin manifestation. At the level of the yin experience, the sorcerer moving between the quanta of light could be said to have entered "the night that never ends" - moving essentially with the light, but for the sake of simple explanations, traveling in the opposite direction, and therefore propelled by the gravity of light itself. Simply put: the effects would be the same, but the experience would be different with regard to perception; and either would be a matter of the sorcerer's intent.
You ask me how to do these things? The answer is not something that can be put to words or musical notes or quantum equations. Instead, it is a mindset, an understanding at the core level of awareness. Stalk it as a hunter would stalk his prey, and one day you will simply *see* the turn alongside the road, and you will take it quite naturally and without conscious effort. You will become The Way instead of trying to find The Way. You will be the immortal other, you will be Whole, with the totality of yourself intricately woven into the energetic structure of what you have become. This is the nature of time, light and energy.
When you understand it through do-ing, you will be at the assemblage point of eternity - beyond the ability of death to undo. Try to understand it with your intellect, it will elude you. Try to talk about it with words, they will strangle you.
This is the Stalker's Dreaming. This is the Dreamer's Stalking.
Only from inside the do-ing will you be able to *see* how the do-ing is done through the not-doing of the fluid will, which operates outside of time, beyond the light, and one step to the left of the darkness.
_______________________
September 1, 2008
All Rights Reserved
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There is a certain sound the wind makes in the night. I cannot call it a voice or even a whisper, just a murmuring of some ancient memory that stirs me awake from a fitful, fevered sleep to find myself sitting up in bed, legs crossed, head tilted forward, pillow clutched to my chest, and the scent of you sketched on the cold, cold air of the darkness as if you were standing there in some otherrealm of the multiverse, in some reality where we were just children on the beach together, then sweethearts, then an old married couple rocking on a wooden porch held together by the gossamer filaments of a love that transcends all reason in order to become the reason itself.
Sometimes you have even encouraged me to play with such thoughts, and in fact I recall you once scolded me for daring to call them 'fantasies'. "Everything begins with a thought," you said, and I heard the words as if for the first time. "Think of me as a fantasy and that is all I will ever be. Dream me with the force of your unreasonable longing, and I cannot help but be everything you want me to be, for that is the nature of energy in motion, the manifestation of creation through the relentless application of Intent."
I remember the night long ago when we had that conversation, and now it comes again, still riding on the broomstick of the wind, no doubt, returning to my haunted room at a time when I need to hear it most. Nothing is impossible except what we determine to be impossible, and even then the determination itself is only a thought which may be eliminated with another thought that whispers in your voice, "All things are possible."
I wonder at times where it is all heading, and why the journey seems so fast, just a drop of mortal blood on the vast canvas of the infinite, but even as that thought finds its way to the surface again, I can almost see you like some illumined portal set against the shadows - an outline of light in the shape of a man through which the entire scope of all things may be accessed. The stars are only grains of finite dust against that mind-boggling tapestry, and all things that can be imagined only a thimble-full of wine in the bottomless cup of all possibility.
The wind stills, gusts again, and seems to be laughing. The scent of you presses closer. The totality of myself embraces me, and I hear my heartbeat like a tiny fluttering of wings somewhere in the night that never ends. "By allowing the impossible, you discover what is real," you tell me, like a lover whispering secrets.
So said the wind in the middle of the night. And so it shall be.
In Dreaming... I am standing face to face with Orlando (my double), but he has taken my own face and form. My sense is that this is to avoid the paradox of "the sorcerer who comes face to face with his double is a dead sorcerer." He says to me, "Death is a position of the assemblage point." This seems obvious to me, yet I realize there is an entire world of Knowledge being downloaded in that statement. A simple, straightforward statement, yet embedded with layers upon layers of data which can barely be conceived by the brain/mind of ordinary awareness. The dream shifts, and I am "Della" again. I am telling Wendy about this dream I had. I say to her, "Orlando was telling me that death is a position of the assemblage point - and as he spoke those words, he took both hands, palms open, and shoved me at the shoulders - the way kids on a playground might shove one another in a form of mock-battle." As I tell her this, I demonstrate by performing the shove on her shoulders. Then, as I push her shoulders, I repeat once again, "Death is a position of the assemblage point." I see her "change" - as if understanding something at a very deep level.
Dream ends...
_____________
As I woke from this dream, the words continued to rattle through my mind. Death is a position of the assemblage point. And something inside me began to turn, to *see* something which is still in the infancy of being *seen*. The push on the shoulders, I simply Knew, was a push to the dual positions of the assemblage point - the tonal & nagual.
I've been toying with trying to write an article for awhile about the dual assemblage point which I have *seen* when working with warriors who have been on the path for any length of time. Most often, people whom I might categorize as "ordinary folk" (not warriors or wo/men of Knowledge, in other words) have what amounts to a single assemblage point that is often fractured & fragmented - non-cohesive. Warriors who have been on the path for a short time will often show a more focused AP. And wo/men of Knowledge will quite often have what I have come to call "a dual assemblage point". The way I have begun to interpret this is that one assemblage point might be described as the tonal self, and the other assemblage point would be the AP of the nagual (or the AP of the double).
When working with this path at a quantum level, it even makes sense why this would be. The energy body may appear to act separately from our human awareness, so it stands to reason that it would possess what amounts to an individual AP. Another way to look at it (in Toltec terms) would be to say that the nagual self goes into third attention to serve as the beacon to the mortal self who remains in first attention (see THE EAGLE'S GIFT by Carlos Castaneda). Carlos stated that the nagual man & nagual woman were two separate beings. My own experience is that this was probably his own experience because he described himself as a "3-prong nagual". Other manifestations of a so-called nagual appear to have different experiences - myself included. Orlando was not an extant or separate being. We are the same being, divided as a matter of facilitating the evolution of both toward the One - i.e., "the totality of oneself".
Anyone coming into this fresh will have virtually no idea what I'm talking about, so my comments here are primarily for my own assimilation, and for anyone who already has some background of my workings with the double.
My current work involves a thorough examination of the dual assemblage point. And my sense from the highlighted dreaming ("death is a position of the assemblage point") is that "death" may be a world most humans assemble "naturally" at the end of their life cycle, but for sorcerers or wo/men of Knowledge, death is nothing more than a position of the assemblage point which may be bypassed through the merging of the dual assemblage points - either at the moment of physical cessation, or perhaps altogether unrelated to the point of physical "death".
We talk about embracing the totality of ourselves, and though I have explained that sufficiently for my own understanding, I nonetheless feel compelled to further this exploration for reasons I have chosen to trust even though I do not entirely understand them. Sometimes I find that when I proceed in this manner, I may be putting out something that someone else needs - which, also, is part of my own assimilation. Other times, I may just be writing my own mythology on the fabric of the universe, and that's okay, too.
But no matter... The thoughts that come to me on the heels of the highlighted dreaming download revolve around the interconnected ideas of burning with the fire from within, and embracing the totality of oneself. Is this accomplished by a merger of the dual assemblage points into what I have come to call a "singularity of consciousness"?
It is simply known to me through my own awareness and experiences that if/when I "die" in this earthly form, I will essentially step out of Della and into Orlando - which is a merger of the dual assemblage points into a singularity, an emergence into the totality of myself. Others will say that this cannot be known, but can only be speculated. And to those people, I would say... you're absolutely right. (For you.)
For myself, I continue to be fascinated with the being referred to by CC as "the tenant" - an organic being who essentially defied "death" and became what I would describe as a "singularity" while still in some manner of corporeal manifestation. DJM referred to this being as an aberration, but... is that really the case? Who's to say? And to NOT ask the question seems to be succumbing to some superstitious fear that may have no basis in reality whatsoever.
Just some rambling thoughts, riding in on the wave of a powerful Dreaming.
"Death is a position of the assemblage point."
Is it an assemblage point we naturally choose? Is it an assemblage point we MUST choose? What are the implications of this knowledge?
______________
This blog entry is excerpted in part from
Questions Along the Way - the third book in the Quantum Shaman series.
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Many thanks and infinite blessings...
Words that keep coming to me lately - the voice of gnosis, always accompanied by a download of information in one form or another. Sometimes the information correlates with things in my own life. Other times, it's like picking up a book at random in the library, and not really having any clue what it's about. There's no cover and no synopsis, and the pages are out of order. But it's all there... just a matter of putting the pieces together. That's how it feels. Sometimes that's even how it works.
I've talked about it before - this long and winding road that stretches out across the desert. Route 66. Kelbaker Road. Nipton Road. Cima Road. Depends on what broken segment of it one is traveling what it's called. In the course of our business, we have occasion to be on that road a couple of times every year... and every time we pass along that way, I find myself thinking of how it seems nothing ever changes out there, except in the seasonal manifestations of summer blistering asphalt with dancing heat monkeys, and a glittering icing of snow on the mountains in winter. This time, ice crystals glittered like diamonds on the road to remind us of the storm that had passed through the night before, but other than these transient reminders of the changing seasons, the land remained exactly as it was the last time we were through there... and the time before that... and the time before that.
Impossible to describe the sense of timelessness that exists out there. Far more than almost anywhere else I have been - more than even in the isolation of the mountains when one is all alone. It is a sense that the world might even be laughing at us in our transient hurry to be always rushing from one location to another, moving our fragile bodies from point A to point B in search of... what? Out there in the stillness, that's what the All of it seemed to be asking as we sat in our car, pushed along by exploding gases in the engine, propelled along a road that is patches on top of patches on top of potholes deep enough to swallow a Volkswagen.
"Where are you going? What are you hoping to find over there that you would not find right here? What is your mission, little ant? Where oh where are you going?"
Oh, there's a rational answer. Simple enough. Going to Las Vegas for a trade show. But that wasn't what the All of it was asking as it stood there all around me, hiding in plain sight with its shivering chaparral bushes and its sea of dry grass and its stalwart Joshua trees. "Where are you going and what are you hoping to find?"
Impossible to put to words, but it often feels to me as if we live in a completely insane, made-up world. The All of it out there in the desert knows it, too. It sees what we humans try to hide from ourselves. It sees our transient nature, and it sees the madness we have built around ourselves in some vain attempt to deny that nature. It sees that the fashion runways at the trade show are just another manifestation of the road to death. One way street, then turn around and go back the way you came, such a short time on the stage, glittering one moment, gone the next. It sees the ruins built along that road to nowhere, and perhaps it even converses with the spirits of those who once inhabited those now-crumbling walls.
"You will see the world change."
The voice of gnosis - different in certain regards from the voice of the All. The place of silent knowing. The heart of the double. For a moment, it's as if the All is on the right, the east; and the double is on the left, the west. Not in any literal sense. Just how I interpreted it for the sake of being able to listen to both sides of this rather profound yet utterly silent conversation which had begun to take on elements of a debate.
The All:
"You pass along this road to nowhere a few times in the course of your mortal life, and then you are swept from the stage, just so much dust at the mercy of the wind, the broom, the hand of time. If asked where you are going, you will say you are going to meet your death so that you might break his hold on you through this state you call freedom, and yet not a single one of you has ever returned from that appointment to report your victory. Therefore, I maintain there is no destination and that the road which you call the path is just a dead end where humans, like lemmings, leap into the ocean to be drowned forever in the Nothing. "You build monuments to the madness of your species - tall buildings stretching toward the sky like bony fingers reaching out of the earth in defiance of their illusory existence. You attach yourselves to cultures and morals and ideas designed to obfuscate the madness which has overtaken your species as a direct result of the knowledge instilled within you that you ARE transient, mortal, impermanent beings. You dispense intangibles to one another in the hopes of defeating the illusion you yourselves have created, but at the end of the day you are still mortal and still human and one day closer to death. You chase the illusion of fortune or fame or whatever it is among you humans that is called 'success', and you pray to your manmade gods to help your team win the SuperBowl, or your team to win whatever war you have manifested, never stopping for a single moment to understand that your prayers fall on the deaf ears of an impersonal universe, and you are therefore only enforcing your own impotence while walking along this road, each step bringing you closer and closer to your death."
Grim little bastard. But not incorrect. That's the hell of it. Somewhere inside of ourselves, we know all of these things. But the madness of our agreement will not allow us to turn and face that awareness. So we sweep it all under the rug and go right on pretending things are going to change. "They" are going to find some magical elixir that will make us all immortal. "They" are going to solve the economic crisis so "we" can go back to our petty indulgences and not have to be reminded of the mess we have made of the world.
And yet... outside the car window, there is only the snow-covered mountain, looking more like some free-form sculpture carved by the unwavering hand of eternity than any sort of natural occurrence. Just an etching on the big blue marble, hand painted with soft vanilla frosting.
It mocks me, with its illusion of permanence.
The Double: "You will see the world change. This is something you know inside yourself, though at times it is difficult to simply Be what you know because of the chatter and clatter of all those places you have been and all those things you are doing and all those roads you have yet to travel. But in your heart, you know it to be true when I tell you that you will see the world change. "Within the hologram of your totality, you are no different than the All, no different than myself. What are we? Simply this: perceptions of the infinite. We are the experience of eternity - the creator of it and the creation itself. This is the way of the warrior, the task of the mortal self and the immortal other as we dream toward one another in the infinite sea of awareness. At this moment inside of time, you perceive the experience from the assemblage point of your humanform existence - the dreamer in the process of creating the dream. As your immortal awareness, I perceive the experience from some other position on the map of time, or off the map altogether. Such is the dance we dance together. Such is the fire that forges the Dream and breathes life into itself: phoenix of its own ashes, the quantum conundrum of the creator breathing life into herself so that she might exist to breathe life into herself.
"You may perceive the crumbling ruins scattered alongside this strange road to Nowhere, while I may perceive those same ruins as a memory of a place I once lived in some otherwhen existence that is no less real than this moment. In a thousand years, perhaps you will walk this same road, or another one that has been built in its place, or perhaps you will walk the silence that lingers long after Man is gone, and you will see this same ruin, only dust now, and you will remember when you passed this way in your mortal manifestation and saw it for the first time. You will see civilizations rise and fall. You will taste the dust of all that has ever been, and at the same time you will Dream the substance of the All, bringing All things into being because that is the nature of creation and the process of evolution. "You are the dreamer and the dream. And in that manifestation, surely you can see how it is that I tell you... You will see the world change."
A fellow seeker recently asked the following question:
"Agree or Disagree? What happens before you agree or disagree with someone?"
It's always seemed odd to me that humans place so much value on whether someone else agrees or disagrees with them. Having examined my own life under a ruthless microscope, I've reached a point where it no longer matters to me if someone agrees or not. But in a way - that's the opposite side of the coin of the question - what happens when we agree or disagree with someone else.
If someone else states an opinion, I may choose to agree or disagree, but as a warrior who is ruthless with herself, that agreement or disagreement will be based on experience and not on some grandiose opinion that probably isn't worth the energy required to express it. Opinions are nothing more than belief systems unless that opinion is based in experience - in which case, it is more accurately a statement of what-is from within the perception and unique reality of the one stating it.
For example, I've had numerous experiences that have proven to me beyond any shadow of a doubt that what we call "time" is an absolute illusion, nothing more than a creation of humans. There is no actual entity or force which can be identified as "time" - therefore, in and of itself, time does not exist. This is not an "opinion". To me, it is a fact of life, a state of being, a knowing from the place of silent knowing. However, it is admittedly subjective, and so whenever I've had people try to argue with me that "time is an absolute", for example, I cannot become invested in their belief systems. In other words: because I have experienced the illusion of time, it makes no difference to me whatsoever if someone else needs to believe in the absoluteness of time or not.
I've had people disagree almost violently with my experiences about the double and the higher self, and yet when I question them, I usually discover (at least 99% of the time) that they are actually disagreeing because they are heavily invested in some belief system that has nothing to do with the manifestation of energy at the level of quantum. Either they still want to believe blindly in reincarnation or resurrection, or they simply do not want to take responsibility for the fact that the double is not some automatic "right" handed out at birth along with fingers and toes. Most people disagree because what is being presented to them threatens their status quo - and rather than allow the new data to perhaps change the way they look at things, they would rather go on seeing the earth as flat as opposed to trying to wrap their mind around a round globe. So, a lot of disagreements are rooted squarely in fear - in specific, a fear of change. Easier to righteously proclaim, "I disagree!" than to consider what is being offered.
Sure, it can be challenging on many levels to get into debates about things of a spiritual nature - largely because most of those things are going to appear nebulous and non-absolute to most people. The reason discussions in Toltec arenas can get heated is because a lot of warriors have had experiences which contradict the consensual reality - aka, "the agreement" - and sometimes even warriors can run the risk of thinking "it matters" whether someone agrees with them or not. It doesn't. Not one bit.
On forums, for example, I might use the words, "I agree" or "I disagree", but it is from a purely detached perspective - at least 99.9% of the time. (The other .01% I allow for Being Human.) But seriously... if you tell me "Worshiping the Tree is the way, the truth & the light," and I happen to say, "I disagree," why would that matter to you in the least? If it does matter, then there is at least a rudimentary doubt in yourself with regard to your own opinion - and at that point you would need to ask yourself whether it is the opinion itself that bears re-examination, or whether you are simply attached to the opinion because it may support some other pre-existing belief system. You would need to ask yourself why someone else's agreement or lack thereof would have any effect on you at all. You might discover that it's just an old program - something inside of you that still struggles for approval or (in certain cases) actually thrives on disagreement and conflict. And yes, the world is full of people who actually do thrive on conflict - largely as a way to create a distraction for themselves so they can go right on believing the very things that are holding them in spiritual stasis.
Even with the works of Carlos Castaneda there are issues, ideas and notions, some of which I agree with, some with which I do not. Perhaps at some point, without resort to anything more than "I think that is right", information is sorted and accepted or rejected. Perhaps it comes down to a matter of trusting self.
Maybe part of it comes down to trusting yourself, but when you say there are things in Castaneda's works with which you do not agree... it might be interesting to ask yourself where that reaction is coming from. If you examine yourself ruthlessly, it won't be difficult to track it down. Maybe you disagree because what is being said somehow conflicts with your existing beliefs. Or maybe you disagree because your own experience contradicts what is being reported. If it's the former... well... you don't have a leg to stand on other than what you believe. If it's the latter, then this begins to address why I have said on occasion that a wo/man of knowledge has what amounts to a "responsibility to the knowledge itself."
An example from my own experiences with Castaneda. I do not agree with everything he has written about the double and double beings (Naguals) because my own experience has been somewhat different. I do not say he was wrong (because there is no right or wrong), but I do feel that there are other ways of looking at what he presented, and so I have offered up my own experiences not to refute CC, but to basically say... "Here's another possibility, based on another person's experience."
I have no doubt that Carlos described his experiences to the best of his ability, but me agreeing or disagreeing with him is entirely pointless if that is based wholly in what I "think" or what I "believe". Only direct experience really means anything in the warrior's world. So when I might disagree with Castaneda about certain things he stated as absolutes with regard to the double and double beings, that disagreement would be based on an experience of my own that does not "validate" what was reported. Neither is right or wrong, but if we are looking at Toltec as a "system of knowledge", I feel it is important for others on the path to report their Knowledge in the same way CC did. Put it out there and let it be. Doesn't matter in the least if someone agrees with me, disagrees, or thinks I'm completely crackers. What matters is the doing of the thing itself, because that is what enables us to define who we are as individuals, rather than just agreeing or disagreeing with what someone else said.
Point being... it's important to know why you are disagreeing - whether from belief, mere opinion, or personal experience. Having that awareness shows you something about yourself. From there, what you do with that awareness is up to you. It's just one more way of taking back your power.
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To read similar articles & essays, please consider the four Quantum Shaman books!
